How to Build Real Friendships as an Adult
Making new friends as an adult is hard—and not because you’re awkward or too introverted. It’s because somewhere along the way, we stopped being taught how to build friendships that last.
The truth? Friendships aren’t formed in one deep brunch convo.
They’re grown over time—in the in-between moments.
The Love Is in the Follow-Up
We tend to think friendship is built through big, deep convos or those 2-hour weekend catch-ups. But honestly? The glue is in the follow-up.
It’s:
Sending that reel that had you laughing at 2am.
Sharing a meme that made you think of them.
Texting just to say, “Hey, this reminded me of you.”
If you cancel plans? Be the one to reschedule.
That communicates care, intention, and consistency.
Because real friendship isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present.
Stop Comparing People to Your Day-Ones
One of the biggest reasons new friendships don’t flourish is because we expect them to feel like our longest relationships right away.
That’s just not how trust works.
You and your closest friend? Y’all have been through things. You’ve repaired, evolved, and shown up over years. If you’re putting that level of pressure on a new connection after one or two meetups, it’s going to feel disappointing—even if the other person is great.
New friendships need space to grow. They need space to breathe.
Drop the Performance and Be Real
You don’t need to be impressive. You don’t need to be the most fun, confident, charismatic person in the room.
You just need to be honest. A little awkward. And genuinely yourself.
That’s what builds connection. That’s what builds trust.
Ready to Build Real Connection Again?
If you’re ready to feel less alone and more supported in your friendships, I created something for you:
How to Trust Again and Make New Connections
It’s a free guide filled with tangible, research-informed tips to help you:
Rebuild trust after friendship burnout
Learn how to follow up with intention (without feeling weird about it)
Stop overthinking and start showing up as your full self
Practice the habits that make new friendships stick
📥 Get your guide HERE
Because your people are out there—and they’re looking for you, too.
